[The question forces him to give pause and really think. Does he want to talk about Shinobu? His thoughts drift to her often but that doesn't mean as much as it seems. He's already accepted some things and now he just has to move past them. If he speaks of her too much... something horrible might come to pass.]
I'm hesitant too... I'm afraid, really and truly afraid of the Fog Witch's vindictiveness. How does she decide who should suffer on her little island of horrors? I imagine she brought me here to torture the ones in Morioh and vice versa. She brings people with already grave struggles and seeks to harm them further. You who has committed one murder that nearly tore your psyche apart must now commit hundreds.
If I speak of her. If I say her name out loud... I fear the Fog Witch might pluck her from Morioh and put here here. It would be of no benefit to me, with this face I do not look like the man I was pretending to be. She does not know me. And then she will have to suffer. There are few things crueler than that, and I would have to watch or perhaps keep my distance knowing she's here while the wicked people of this world spread their thoughts about me.
No. I cannot risk the witch bringing her here. And if she ever does there is no force in this world that will stop me from finding this so called God and tearing her apart.
[And that may be the most sincere Kira has been in a long long time.]
[Well. Good then. He's said more than he cares to about things far too personal. That would make both Josuke and Marco the two people here that know far too much about him.]
I know many people don't think too kindly of me. And that's within their rights. But, I will say, I'm quite dedicated in the efforts to get home. I don't intend to change who I am for it though. But, when it comes to defeating her, that is something I'm behind one hundred percent.
[Of course Kira doesn't intend to change himself. That much has become saddeningly clear. Yet... Marco can't quite give up the hope that change will happen regardless. Maybe it would take a miracle, but... he IS a man of faith.]
It's just... Well... [How should he put it?] Acting too much like one of her people, that's not... It's not good.
[He doesn't need to hear the preaching of a priest. Especially when it's wrong.]
The Fourth God doesn't seem to mind how I do things. When I spoke to him he seemed to have the same understanding that I do about people.
He made me a lovely promise. A promise that's going to punish everyone when he wins. Perhaps it's not acting as her people but as just people in general. The Fog Witch didn't create violence. It's been in us all along. People are violent and cruel. The fog emplifies it no doubt but she doesn't cause it. If we believe that then we're passing blame for things and denying who we are as people.
And if she is not the cause of violence then the Fourth has no reason to be against it.
No offense to you, Marco, but I don't think you understand our God very well. I think the only person who does is Mr. Malfoy. He certainly sees things the way I do, and it's quite nice.
[Unfortunately, Marco is stubborn, not to mention more than a little deluded, and so, as Kira says all that and Marco grows increasingly irritated, his thoughts wander off in parallel directions - whether Kira is lying or just misunderstanding things, what reasons he would have to lie, the likelihood that this is just him twisting things to fit his own worldview, as he seems to have a tendency to do so...
... That said, Marco is almost grateful for the chance to gripe about something tangible and certain.]
You're friends with Lucius. Of all people. Right, I nearly forgot.
[The comment causes Kira to smirk. Everything that he said is ignored for a quip at his good friend.
Poor Marco. When the world collapses right under him it will truly be a sight Kira does not want to miss.]
Mister Malfoy is a charming and brilliant man. You should give him a chance. Maybe you can save him too.
[Tightening his tie just so, Kira makes to leave. There's no point in pressing or mentioning that Marco avoided all points of interest but that's fine. Silence says everything sometimes.]
[This comment forces Kira to pause. It's just so... ludacris to hear from Marco.
Is Lucius a good person in what he would call, Marco's world? No. Probably not. There is something beneath the surface that Kira finds interesting. He and Mister Malfoy do not discuss such things but there is a mutual understanding that they will both do what they have to in this world. They ate not what Marco would call good people.]
Yes, Goblins are very low class in his magical world. As are merfolk. But we're not actually these creatures you know. And we don't intend to stay this way. Who cares what he says? The end goal is not to be these abominations that we hate. I don't care for any of the monsters. And I understand why he feels the same.
Have you grown to like this version of yourself, Marco? Do you perhaps want to stay the way you are?
[If Kira thinks Marco hasn't thought about the sentiment behind his words, he is wrong. Marco hates it. It's deeply irrational in a way that can only be explained if he no longer identifies as a human, which means that is precisely what has happened to him, and it makes him want to scream.]
That's why I have to stop her. [He's very, very quiet.] What she's done to-- What she's doing to us all is unforgivable.
I don't disagree. What you want and what I want aren't so different. But this is a war, is it not? Defeating the Fog god and warring against her followers...
[He dismisses Killer Queen and steps back towards Marco, hands firmly on his hips and expression rather impassive.]
Now, I don't know much about that sort of thing. I was born after the great wars and never lived in a time where my country had to fight in one. I've only ever lived in a peaceful time. But I do know some things... And I know that in a situation like this it doesn't matter how you fight or win just that you do.
War is filled with terrible things... And the losers suffer horribly and no one talks about what is done. That is the kind of mentality we must go in with. You should be glad to have people like Mister Malfoy and myself on your side. We can do what you cannot. And we will without hesitation. Without regret. And you and all the other fourth followers can turn your nose up to it and threaten my place here but you'd be wrong to do so.
Imagine life here if she wins... Imagine what she'll do to you if she ever gets her claws into one of our God's priests... If she gets her claws into our Fourth God himself.
Unspeakable thing are done to the losers... and there is no comfort in the aftermath. There is no peace. It will be with you always. No one remembers the losers, Marco. No one cares what happens to them.
[Marco lets him talk, in part because he isn't immediately sure what to say.
If he said he doesn't like war, he'd just be proving Kira's point, wouldn't he? And if he said this isn't a war... Well, he's not entirely sure he wouldn't be lying.
Fundamentally, he doesn't agree with Kira. But as for whether that's out of pure stubbornness, he can't say. Right now, no better arguments occur to him.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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I'm hesitant too... I'm afraid, really and truly afraid of the Fog Witch's vindictiveness. How does she decide who should suffer on her little island of horrors? I imagine she brought me here to torture the ones in Morioh and vice versa. She brings people with already grave struggles and seeks to harm them further. You who has committed one murder that nearly tore your psyche apart must now commit hundreds.
If I speak of her. If I say her name out loud... I fear the Fog Witch might pluck her from Morioh and put here here. It would be of no benefit to me, with this face I do not look like the man I was pretending to be. She does not know me. And then she will have to suffer. There are few things crueler than that, and I would have to watch or perhaps keep my distance knowing she's here while the wicked people of this world spread their thoughts about me.
No. I cannot risk the witch bringing her here. And if she ever does there is no force in this world that will stop me from finding this so called God and tearing her apart.
[And that may be the most sincere Kira has been in a long long time.]
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Marco's mouth stretches into a faint, lopsided smile.]
That's fine. I think I've heard enough.
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I know many people don't think too kindly of me. And that's within their rights. But, I will say, I'm quite dedicated in the efforts to get home. I don't intend to change who I am for it though. But, when it comes to defeating her, that is something I'm behind one hundred percent.
I wouldn't be here if I wasn't.
That should be enough, don't you think?
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It's just... Well... [How should he put it?] Acting too much like one of her people, that's not... It's not good.
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The Fourth God doesn't seem to mind how I do things. When I spoke to him he seemed to have the same understanding that I do about people.
He made me a lovely promise. A promise that's going to punish everyone when he wins. Perhaps it's not acting as her people but as just people in general. The Fog Witch didn't create violence. It's been in us all along. People are violent and cruel. The fog emplifies it no doubt but she doesn't cause it. If we believe that then we're passing blame for things and denying who we are as people.
And if she is not the cause of violence then the Fourth has no reason to be against it.
No offense to you, Marco, but I don't think you understand our God very well. I think the only person who does is Mr. Malfoy. He certainly sees things the way I do, and it's quite nice.
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... That said, Marco is almost grateful for the chance to gripe about something tangible and certain.]
You're friends with Lucius. Of all people. Right, I nearly forgot.
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Poor Marco. When the world collapses right under him it will truly be a sight Kira does not want to miss.]
Mister Malfoy is a charming and brilliant man. You should give him a chance. Maybe you can save him too.
[Tightening his tie just so, Kira makes to leave. There's no point in pressing or mentioning that Marco avoided all points of interest but that's fine. Silence says everything sometimes.]
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[But Kira is already leaving. This doesn't stop Marco from continuing to nag as he goes, though:]
Look, he has some very troubling views on merfolk-- You know, I'm fairly sure he hated goblins until he became one!
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Is Lucius a good person in what he would call, Marco's world? No. Probably not. There is something beneath the surface that Kira finds interesting. He and Mister Malfoy do not discuss such things but there is a mutual understanding that they will both do what they have to in this world. They ate not what Marco would call good people.]
Yes, Goblins are very low class in his magical world. As are merfolk. But we're not actually these creatures you know. And we don't intend to stay this way. Who cares what he says? The end goal is not to be these abominations that we hate. I don't care for any of the monsters. And I understand why he feels the same.
Have you grown to like this version of yourself, Marco? Do you perhaps want to stay the way you are?
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That's why I have to stop her. [He's very, very quiet.] What she's done to-- What she's doing to us all is unforgivable.
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[He dismisses Killer Queen and steps back towards Marco, hands firmly on his hips and expression rather impassive.]
Now, I don't know much about that sort of thing. I was born after the great wars and never lived in a time where my country had to fight in one. I've only ever lived in a peaceful time. But I do know some things... And I know that in a situation like this it doesn't matter how you fight or win just that you do.
War is filled with terrible things... And the losers suffer horribly and no one talks about what is done. That is the kind of mentality we must go in with. You should be glad to have people like Mister Malfoy and myself on your side. We can do what you cannot. And we will without hesitation. Without regret. And you and all the other fourth followers can turn your nose up to it and threaten my place here but you'd be wrong to do so.
Imagine life here if she wins... Imagine what she'll do to you if she ever gets her claws into one of our God's priests... If she gets her claws into our Fourth God himself.
Unspeakable thing are done to the losers... and there is no comfort in the aftermath. There is no peace. It will be with you always. No one remembers the losers, Marco. No one cares what happens to them.
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If he said he doesn't like war, he'd just be proving Kira's point, wouldn't he? And if he said this isn't a war... Well, he's not entirely sure he wouldn't be lying.
Fundamentally, he doesn't agree with Kira. But as for whether that's out of pure stubbornness, he can't say. Right now, no better arguments occur to him.]
... I'm doing all I can.
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[It's rhetorical and he doesn't need to hear an answer especially if Marco is just going to say yes.
So Kira gives the Mer one last observing look before turning away. If nothing else maybe he gave the blond something to chew on. Probably not though.]